Saturday, September 26, 2009

Funny Links Saturday!

I'm going to try and enjoy the weekend as best as possible, but I hate the fact that school is always breathing down your neck these days...

So, in order to create the pinnacle of enjoyment this fine weekend, I have gathered some funny links for you.

- Cake Wrecks (birthday, wedding, and every-possible-occasion* cakes go horribly, hilariously wrong)

* sadly, I am not kidding here

- Tv Tropes: Cowboy Bebop At His Computer (hilarious instances of news media getting the names of things wrong and generally flushing fact-checking down the pooper)

- The "Blog" of "Unnessisary" Quotation Marks (quotation marks "used" in "downright" wrong places)

- Photoshop Disasters (companies take note - continue to not hire editors so that this hilarity goes on)

Have a great weekend!

~ Pirka

Friday, September 25, 2009

Vrank Vrog It's Vriday

Friday causes wierd feelings in the best of us.

Vour vrobably vondering vhy I'm valking vhis vay.
Vt vas vothing vo do vith vampires.

It has everything to do with...

Uh...ok. I understand your confusion. Not a lot of people are nerd enough to know what "V" is. For the uninitiated, "V" is a science-fiction cult series about aliens called the Visitors who come to Earth, supposedly in peace, and in actuality have quite sinister plans. That's the absolute bare bones of it, but it's much cooler than it sounds.

I was personally introduced to the awesomeness of "V" by the equally awesome website X Entertainment, a site that usually reviews things from the 80s (especially things that hold that special 80s combination of 'win-fail'). Sadly, the site barely ever updates anymore, but on the plus side there are tons of archives to surf through including the (previously) annual Halloween and Christmas countdowns.
One of the items in a post about wierd dolls was a "V" Visitor alien doll. I was curious, so I looked up the series and eventually became hooked.

According to my mom, the trailer looks "really polished". I'm really curious to see how the remake fares, considering how cheesy the original was. Regardless, I'll be watching.

Don't get jealous, Keroro. You'll still be my favourite questionable invader.

~ Pirka

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

NyErro~n + A WarioWare Script, of all things?

[Click on it if you really want to see this abomination larger]

This, my friends, is what I do at school when I'm really, really bored.

Even weirder? That's not all. Last night, I picked up WarioWare: Twisted! for the first time in years; when I originally bought it, I actually found it too difficult to play. Now it's the same level as the other WW games to me, and dang nab it if it isn't one of the funnest things I've ever played. Of course, the night before, I finally beat the ORIGINAL WarioWare, Inc.: congrats, Pirka, it took you over 3 years to beat a video game.

Of course, as I lay awake in bed after playing, ideas of possible stage-themes crossed my mind, which led to this story: the epic adventures of Dr. Crygor, Penny Crygor, and a very angry snow crab.


Dr. Crygor bursts through the door of his laboratory, carrying a GROCERY BAG. He skids to a halt in front of a table, rubbing his hands together before pulling a large CRAB out of the bag. He looks at it with hungry eyes. A TABLE appears in front of him (as if it teleported there), set up for a meal (with CUTLERY, a PLATE, and SALT AND PEPPER SHAKERS).

He puts the crab on the plate, drooling.

On-Screen Text:
Bon Appitite!

He's about to cut it open...but the crab is still alive, and it has other ideas! With angry eyebrows, it lunges for Crygor and CLAMPS ITS CLAW TIGHTLY onto CRYGOR'S NOSE!

On-Screen Text:

Crygor JUMPS UP AND DOWN frantically, clearly in a lot of PAIN.

(Diamond City Map: Penny's House)

Dr. Crygor's granddaughter, PENNY CRYGOR, hears Dr. Crygor's SCREAM all the way across town. She gets up with a start and RUNS OUT THE DOOR.

Cut back to DR. CRYGOR'S LAB.
Penny OPENS THE DOOR and runs into the lab, shocked.

On-Screen Text:
Penny: Grandpa...?!

Penny RUNS OFFSCREEN. When she returns, she is holding a comically large PAIR OF PLIERS.
She jumps towards Crygor, pliers SHINING DRAMATICALLY.

On-Screen Text:
Penny: I'll get you out of this fix!

She GRABS the crab with her pliers and starts to try to PULL it off...]

This is where the microgames start! By winning microgames, you help Penny detach the crab from Dr. Crygor's (now undoubtebly sore) nose.
The counter is a simple 'digital-clock'-style number at the bottom of the screen.
The lives are four little pairs of pliers like the one Penny is using, one in each corner of the screen.
When you WIN a microgame: Penny tugs hard at the crab and it appears to loosen a little.
When you LOSE a microgame/life: The crab clamps down harder and Dr. Crygor cries a bit.


Penny and Crygor are both PANTING, exhausted. Apparently, even after pulling so hard, the crab just WON'T BUDGE.

On-Screen Text:
Penny: I can't dislodge it! It's holding on too tightly!
Dr. Crygor: ...Unfortunately...this means...there are no alternative methods...
Penny: ...Yes...?
Dr. Crygor: ...We'll have to amputate!


On-Screen Text:
Penny: There has to be a better way!

Penny RUNS BACK AND FORTH, as if thinking very hard of another way to get the crab off.

On-Screen Text:
Penny: WOAH! {CRASH!}

CLOSE UP on the TABLE. Penny, clumsy as always, accedentally BUMPS THE TABLE, sending the PEPPER SHAKER flying across the room, leaving a cloud of PEPPER behind it...

On-Screen Text:
Dr. Crygor: ...Ah...Ahhh...
Dr. Crygor: ...AHHHHHH...

CLOSE UP on Dr. Crygor.

On-Screen Text:

Dr. Crygor SNEEZES VIOLENTLY, accompanied by a REPEAT CUT (as if it were an epic finishing blow).
The crab FLIES OFF, looking very SURPRISED as it hurdles through the air.
It lands on the ground, EYES SWIRLS.

On-Screen Text:
Dr. Crygor: Ughhh...{snorfle}...

Crygor REALIZES that the crab has become detached.

On-Screen Text:
Dr. Crygor: Huzzah! The infernal crustation has been removed!
Dr. Crygor: Now, at long last, I may eat it!

Penny looks a little DISGUSTED.

On-Screen Text:
Penny: ...Shouldn't we wash it first...?

PAN OVER to the crab, eyes still SWIRLS. It is visibly SPLATTERED WITH MUCUS...

On-Screen Text:
Dr. Crygor: That would be a sufficient plan. ]


Yeah, I really have no clue where this SILLINESS came from! It just came out of nowhere...but I can imagine it really clearly. I love the sense of humor in WarioWare!

~ Pirka

Friday, September 18, 2009

TFIF In The New School Year

Homework sucks, de arimasu~!

Thank Frog It's Friday.

Also, Thank Frog I Actually Posted On This Blog Again! A lot has happened since I last posted on here. Namely, I went to Fan Expo Canada with my BFF, Nyktos - he slept over at my place for 2 days to allow for maximum nerdage - it was an absolute blast! I bought figures (of course) and the entire series of Azumanga Daioh. Nyk bought a Gurren Lagann shirt and more figures. At the end of every day we came back to my house to watch DVDs. (BAAAASSSSKEEEETBAALLLLL!)

I'm finally a Senior High School student. This past summer was one of my best ever, and, as always, school sucks major sausage - but, there's a silver lining:


This is going to be the most awesome thing ever. For now though, I'm just counting down the days and trying not to split my head open over school stress.

~ Pirka